A Sloth's Life - A Sloth's Life

Transcript for this weeks video A Sloth’s Life:

And back to regularly scheduled programming…

Do you ever wake up, stretch your stiff limbs, make a great big sigh, think, YES, YES! Today is the day! The day you are going to swing back those covers and hop to it. Cleaning, working, showering! Doing it all, like a real Martha Stewart.

But then you finish the stretch, and the sigh comes to an end, and instead of doing it all, you just turn over and close your eyes again?

I thought so.

You see, mornings are a complicated yet soothing time for me. Does that make sense? Well, let me illuminate on the subject. Mornings are when I am filled with the least amount of anxiety. Even if I had to get to the office, or the florist shop, where a mountain of anxiety awaited, I still reveled in the mornings.

I am an easer. What does that mean?

It means I have never been one to just show up and get to work, I don’t wake up and start my day; I ease into it. I used to work for a very big company, in a very big city. I would purposely show up 30 minutes early every morning. I needed to have my coffee and my breakfast. Organize myself, read the news, just be calm in the quiet office. And as the minutes ticked by and more and more people showed up, by the time it finally hit 9, I was completely ready to start the day. I could not fathom showing up at 9, opening my email, and just going. Even now, the thought makes me… {gagging sound}

I am sure a lot of other people are like this. I can’t tell you the relief I felt when I learned I was not the only person to get out of a shower and proceed to sit in my bed, in my bed, and do absolutely nothing for at least an hour.

After running away to the countryside, I returned home to my apartment just as I had left it. And I slithered right back into my cocoon of slothing, and though I was productive enough, I was still a bit off.

And please don’t mind the porridge. Of course, my camera died in the middle of this, and then I had to wait, and it was beyond dry and sticky, and I had to use far too much honey. And uh, well, my porridge has definitely seen betters days, but it was still quite yummy. I do love a plum.

Now that I’m on Youtube, you also wind up being o Youtube more, and I had been watching some videos about routines, and resets, and intentionality and one in particular – which I will link below- struck me with this deep, deep urge to wake up Monday morning and make at least one small change. And I would attempt to keep that change for the entire week.

Working for myself, working from home, I go to bed every night, as I’m sure many of us do, with grand intentions, but every morning I wind up sitting in my bed or the sofa, coffee cup in hand for HOURS. I am reaching for my phone without even realizing it and mindlessly scrolling things. And perhaps most people would say so? You work for yourself, you control your schedule. And you would be correct if I wasn’t so neurotic about time. Time is of the essence in my world and probably a lot of others, but we’ve somewhat gotten off the subject.

The point is I came home and realized if I could just make one small change, it would lead to bigger ones. So obvious, I know, I almost cried at the absurdity. But I have never been a middle of the way kinda person. It’s all or nothing, go big or go home or literally just don’t do anything at all. But now, the middle seems like such a cozy place to be.

So the one change I made this week was waking up and spending 5 mins focusing on my breathing. Not reaching for my phone, not turning over to see if I can sleep some more. But allowing myself those 5 mins to ease into being awake.

And I hope next weeks perhaps, if successful, in keeping up that, come Monday, I might be able to add one other small change- and build and build and build until finally, finally, get myself out of the slothing slithering rut I find myself in.

The Story of a Human

The question is not “Am I Happy?”

Sometimes I put on pants…